During the past 50 years, managers, supervisors, consultants and recently, coaches, have been talking about leadership and its impact in economic growth and the power in building relationships. The thing is that there is still a difficult process in order to provide enough training to prepare a person to become a leader. There is actually nothing that can tell you exactly how to gain followers or to give you enough skills to be considered as a leader.
The fact is that, the concept of leadership has come to an end. If Mr. Warren Bennis was reading this quote, he would have said that it never existed at all, as he stated “Of all the hazy and confounding areas in social psychology, leadership theory undoubtedly contends for top nomination. . . . Probably more has been written and less is known about leadership than about any other topic in the behavioral sciences”.
According to research performed by George Vaillant, a Harvard Psychiatrist, in his report of Harvard Men and Their Trait, points out that as more as you can do for others, the better-fulfilled life you will have. He said “winter comes to every one of us sooner or later. And every spring, just like clockwork, the garden is reborn. By the time we die the real question is, what have we done to leave our garden better prepared for spring- someone else’s spring?”
Taking this into consideration, and the idea that people would be willing to help other people that has helped them, leadership is a concept that loses power in front of “Giving”.
Even though there’s a cornucopia of definitions and phrases for the verb “to give”, the one provided by Charles Dickens creates a sense of belonging, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of another”. Every day we have the opportunity to give. Just pay attention to your daily behavior and your environment.
Professor Henry Mintzberg surely missed one thing when he proposed the ‘10 managerial roles’. And of course, it is the role of giving. In his book “Managers, No MBAs”, he says you cannot train students in a classroom. Actually, if you include a model to teach them the importance of giving in your instructional design and implement it in the curriculum of business schools and management centers, they would achieve a higher managerial skill.
I state 5 powerful quotes about this new model:
1. Giving Allows You To Recognize Others’ Needs And To Be Able To Participate In Certain Circumstances That You Would Probably Not Be Able To Do If They Do Not Open Their Doors To You.
The communication process that we have will determine whether we understand or know the possible needs on each of our colleagues. Intrinsically, every conversation might state certain needs but, are you really listening? If you are only listening to sounds and voices, you might be taken out of the ring before the bell rings. On the other hand, if you are able to identify the emotions related to the words that person is expressing to you, then we are opening the real door.
2. Giving Is The Power Of Existing In Another Person’s Life And Not Only To Exist But To Become Meaningful.
Have you ever been told that you always have good ideas or solutions? If so, let me tell you that you perhaps have created a very positive impact in that person. Maybe that person feels certain trustability in you. So, it means that you are someone who is looked after when creativity is needed.
If not, do not worry; it does not mean that you are not really helping or you are useless. In fact, this is very common, because people tend to express more negative feelings than positive ones, and this is actually a wide potential to be helpful. Let people know that you are available. Let people feel you are opened for them. Don’t just walk your name tag around the place, but inspire a warm smile among the people around you by being meaningful and close to them. Beware of this, helping does not mean doing their responsibilities, but to guide them towards them.
When a person asks for your help, think about this: “What has that person seen in me in order to ask for my help or advice? Maybe you don’t realize yet, but your behavior, image and personality inspire or disuade, that’s your choice.
3. Giving Is The Stage In Which You Receive Recognition Among Others In The Way They Feel Safe To What You Recommend.
As a part of the previous conceptualization, the way in which we are able to give triggers an instant rush of trust in the people around us. In time, those people will feel comfortable by receiving your opinion and comments, because you have created a mystical bond throughout the help you have given them.
4. Giving Permits The Exploration Of Your Own Talents.
Perhaps you may wonder if you are good at giving or not, maybe you can identify your own issues which can be unsolved at the moment, but when you give, you understand your own capabilities. When you give, you open a new door for new experiences. When you give, you find a deeper understanding of yourself.
Giving helps you find those hidden talents which could be named as: intuition, perception, analysis, critical thinking, to mention a few. How? With the simple act of being there for someone. Sometimes we need others to tell us how good we are at helping so we can realize how valuable you can actually be when you are in connection with your environment.
Looking at a reflection of our intelligences, Howard Gardner in 1983, in an effort to explain the way in which our brain can process and develop the interrelationship of these multiple intelligences and among them, he mentions the interpersonal intelligence. The ability to understand others emotions, feelings, motivations and intentions. You can only permeate of these factors if you permit yourself to explore your own talents.
5. Giving Is Much More Easily Than You Think. You Can Be A Giver Just By Listening.
If you are thinking that finding your talents is too difficult for the moment. You can start with a very basic technique. Pay attention to what they say. Not only focusing on what they say but, how they say it. Sometimes you can stay there staring at people while they speak without saying any words and just magically after that, people will tell you that you have helped them enormously.
Next time you listen there is a problem in the organization, do not ask who did it but say ‘Let me help you’.